9 Questions to Ask Yourself: Signs of Postpartum Anxiety and Depression

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, owner of The Happiest Doulas

Symptoms of postpartum depression can appear any time during pregnancy and the first 12 months after childbirth. If you recognize that help is needed, call your doctor or midwife for a referral to a trained therapist. Also, like this Facebook page for peer support and further guidance. Don't wait to get help!! 
 

Below are 9 questions to help you determine if help is needed.

1. Are you feeling sad or depressed?

2. Do you feel more irritable or angry with those around you?

3. Are you having difficulty bonding with your baby?

4. Do you feel anxious or panicky?

5. Are you having problems with eating or sleeping?

6. Are you having upsetting thoughts that you can’t get out of your mind?

7. Do you feel as if you are “out of control” or “going crazy”?

8. Do you feel like you never should have become a mother?

9. Are you worried that you might hurt your baby or yourself?

Get Help Now

Postpartum Support International hosts free, live phone sessions every week, including Wednesday chats for parents who have given birth, and on the first Monday of each month, a chat is held to support partners. You can also join online meetings and groups for peer support.

Your doula can help you to identify the important people in your village, and how they can help you once your baby is here.
 

I strongly believe in a proactive, preventative approach to help you build up your resources and help you develop a postpartum plan for wellness before your baby arrives. Your plan should include realistic ways to make sure you are getting physical activity, that your nutritional needs are being met, that you have a plan to make sure you are getting some sleep and rest.

Set aside some time soon so you and your partner can talk about expectations for yourselves and each other in your new roles as parents. Identify ways that you can continue to connect as a couple and find time to make sure your relationship is getting the attention it needs. And, if despite your efforts, you do experience significant distress postpartum, our team can provide you with local resources for help.

If you find this post helpful, please share this post with your friends to help raise awareness of postpartum depression and anxiety. Spreading the message helps to destigmatize mental health issues and the desire to seek care.

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Capture the Magic of Parenthood with a Birth Doula Photographer

Are you looking for a way to preserve the precious moments of your birthing experience forever? Look no further than The Happiest Doulas! The owner, Cynthya, combines the skills of a doula and a professional photographer to provide you with an unparalleled experience, capturing the raw emotions, tender moments, and joyous milestones of your journey into parenthood.

Why Hire a Birth Doula-Photographer?

1. Memories to Treasure: Your birthing experience is a one-of-a-kind event, filled with intense emotions and unforgettable moments. Cynthya is a birth doula-photographer trained to expertly capture these breathtaking moments, allowing you to relive them for years to come. From those first cries to the first bonding moments, every detail will be beautifully documented.

2. Personalized Support: Cynthya is an experienced and compassionate professional who understands the unique needs and desires of expectant families - she’s been doing this work for over 15 years! By hiring her as your birth doula-photographer, you not only gain a skilled photographer but also an incredible support system. She’ll be there to provide comfort, guidance, and encouragement throughout your birth, ensuring a positive experience while capturing stunning, authentic images.

3. Professional Expertise: Cynthya is specially trained in documenting birth stories. She understands the intricacies and challenges of childbirth, ensuring that they are in the right place at the right time to capture those irreplaceable moments. With a keen eye for detail and artistic composition, she creates images that are both breathtaking and emotionally resonant.

4. Soothing Presence: The presence of a birth doula photographer can bring a sense of calm and reassurance during the birthing process. Having someone dedicated to capturing these moments allows you to fully focus on the miracle of bringing your baby into the world, knowing that you don't have to worry about missing a single precious second.

5. A Lasting Legacy: Nothing compares to the emotional impact of looking back at the photographs that encapsulate the journey of bringing your child into the world. Having these cherished memories shared with your child as they grow creates a powerful bond and a beautiful legacy for generations to come.

Booking a birth photographer is an important step in preparing for your birth experience. Here are key tips to consider when making your decision:

• Research: Start by researching local birth photographers. Look at their portfolios to ensure their style aligns with your vision for capturing this moment.

• Reviews and Recommendations: Read reviews from previous clients and seek recommendations from friends or childbirth professionals.

• Availability: Check the photographer's availability around your due date. Birth can be unpredictable, so make sure they have a flexible schedule.

• Meeting and Consultation: Schedule a meeting or phone call to discuss your preferences, ask questions, and gauge if you feel comfortable with the photographer.

• Packages and Pricing: Inquire about their packages, including what is offered (e.g., prenatal sessions, delivery coverage, postpartum sessions) and the associated costs.

• Contract and Payment: Review the contract carefully before signing. Pay attention to details about deposits, cancellation policies, and rights to the images.

• Discuss Your Preferences: Communicate your preferences for the birth, including any specific moments you want to be captured and your comfort levels concerning photography during labor.

• Backup Plan: Ask about their backup plans in case they are unable to attend the birth due to unforeseen circumstances.

• Follow-Up: After booking, keep in touch with your photographer leading up to your due date to ensure they are updated on your preferences.

Taking the time to choose the right birth photographer will help you capture the unique experience of your birth story. Book a consultation call today with Cynthya.

9 Suggestions to Try When Your Baby Won't Take a Bottle During the Day

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, childbirth educator, and owner of The Happiest Doulas 

So you've been a champion breastfeeder for months, your baby has a great sleep routine, and now it's time for you to return to work. No problem, right? You've got the perfect daycare lined up and you're excited for this new change. You drop your baby off at daycare and with a somewhat heavy heart, full of mixed feelings, you head off to work. After a successful workday, you go to pick up your little bundle of joy. The daycare teacher said he was terrific, except that he wouldn't drink more than a few ounces from his bottle the whole day. What now? Your baby begs to nurse and acts ravenous the rest of the evening and into the night, waking every couple of hours to nurse. You're exhausted and have to function at your job the next day. Sound familiar?

Helpful tips for bottle feeding a breastfed baby

Follow these tips to transition your baby from the breast to the bottle when your baby refuses to feed from a bottle.
 

• Establish an early bedtime for your baby. Being around other babies at daycare can cause shorter naps, which leads to an overtired baby by the end of the day. Putting your baby down to sleep between 7pm and 8pm is best. Be sure any feedings throughout the rest of the night are done with the least amount of stimulation and in as much darkness as possible to keep your little one in sleep mode.
  

• If your baby is 6 months or older, try feeding your baby breastmilk from a sippy cup. Sometimes this option appeals more to a baby. Try a few different kinds of sippy cups with various types of nipples.
  

• Try sneaking in some extra nursing sessions throughout the day. Try to nurse as soon as your baby wakes up in the morning and before arriving at daycare. If your job allows you some extra time during your lunch break, visit your baby and nurse, or if possible, have someone bring your baby to you during your lunch break. When you get home from work in the evening, try cluster feeding until bedtime. Cluster feeding means to hold several feeding sessions close together within just a few hours.
  

• Use loud white noise throughout the night to help keep your baby calm and in a deeper sleep.

• Feed your baby a bottle in a quiet, non-distracting place. Take your baby to a quiet area for a few minutes and rock or sing softly to get your baby comfortable with the area. Then gently offer the bottle.
  

• Don't try to offer a bottle when your baby is starving. You would think offering a bottle when your baby is very hungry would cause him to eat out of desperation, but this sometimes backfires on you. Experiment with trying to find your baby's midpoint between acting not too interested in feeding and being quite hungry. It will take some trial and error.
  

• When bottle feeding, hold baby in a different position than when you breastfeed. Babies often do better with a bottle if they are not cradled similar to when breastfeeding. Face your baby away from your body, somewhat reclined, with their back to your stomach.
  

• Experiment with the nipple flow. Some babies like a slow flow and others like a faster flowing nipple. If you choose a faster flow, be aware some babies can't handle it and may choke easily.
  

• Try different bottle types. Some babies prefer a wider mouthed nipple that resembles the breast, while others prefer a smaller size. Don't go out and spend a fortune on different types, though. Two or three different kinds should be enough with which to experiment.
  

Important newborn tip: During this time, be sure to have your daycare keep track of wet diapers. To avoid dehydration, you want to make sure your baby has 6-7 wet diapers per day.

This can be a very frustrating time for parents. Between sleep deprivation and the transition to working again, it can seem like your world is upside down. Have patience. All babies are very different and many take time to get used to a new routine. Stick with it and he'll soon accept the new feeding routine.

For more info on how to jump the hurdles of breastfeeding, see if this affiliate online course and other resources (some are free!) by Lactation Link are right for you.

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5 Tools For Birth Partners: From “Helpless” to “Hero” During Labor and Delivery

by Megan Ciampa, Birth Boot Camp Childbirth Instructor

Have you ever seen a woman in labor? If you have, then you may know that the intensity of what a laboring woman is experiencing can be so great that her support team can fumble and in fact, be the ones in need of support. Sometimes, sitting with someone in their pain is harder than trying “all the things” to reduce it or wish it away! (A doula can help…) And sometimes, it may be what leads mom to an early epidural in labor when she may not have really needed it.
 

Photography provided by Birth Boot Camp

But what if you could legitimately provide support and help a laboring woman achieve the birth she desires? The good news is that you can.

Here are the 5 tools for a birth partner to help during labor:

1. Muscle observation. Take a look at mom’s face. Is it tight, clenched? Notice her jaw and throat. If it’s tightly closed or clenched, this will directly impact how tight and clenched the rest of her body is, particularly her cervix, which needs to open and soften in order for baby to come down through the birth canal and be born. Gently encourage her to relax her jaw. If she’s not in a mood to be talked to, gently place your hand or fingers on the area that is tense to help remind her to relax.

2. Sound out contractions with her. Women can make interesting sounds during labor. However, sometimes moms go silent in labor as they internally work through labor, and need reminding to feel the freedom to sound out their labor. This can be unnerving for women who “don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable,” so help open the door for her by sounding out the labor sounds with her. Low moaning, groaning, or “ohmmm” noises may really help her relax and let go.

3. Get her in the water. Often called the “aqua-dural,” the water has a unique way of helping a woman cope with the intensities of labor. Whether it’s a shower with focused pressure at various points on her back or belly, or the bathtub, the water really helps a woman relax, and may help you relax too.

4. Keep things interesting. Just like in your relationship, variety is a good thing and it’s the same with labor. Every 30 or so minutes, suggest mom makes a position change. If she’s been leaning against the wall or the bed, suggest she walk or take low squats. If she’s been in the water, suggest she lean backwards against the toilet. These subtle shifts in her movement help her from getting stuck in labor and bring baby closer to delivery.

5. Maybe most importantly, be aware of the environment and people in the room. Is the room too cold? Too bright? Are the people in there supporting and providing relief, or bringing tension and doubtfulness? It’s totally within your prerogative to act as a bouncer and tell others to leave or give mom some privacy for a few minutes. Even better--send them out get snacks or treats for the birth center or hospital staff--always a nice touch!
    

And the best way to help someone in labor is to learn more about childbirth. Not only will this ease any insecurities or questions you have, but it will also be a bonding experience as you prepare for a new baby. And of course, we recommend having a birth doula by your side for labor and delivery.
 

Related posts:
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2023 Update: Episiotomy and C-section Rates at Atlanta and St Pete Hospitals

by Cynthya Dzialo, Birth Doula-Photographer, Lactation Counselor, and Owner of The Happiest Doulas

Experts agree that Cesarean Sections or c-sections, particularly among low-risk, first-time mothers, may not be necessary and can actually be risky for mother and baby. C-sections are linked to an increased risk of infections and blood clots, and many women who aren’t at higher risk for delivery complications get unnecessary c-sections.*

Various evidence-based strategies aimed at hospitals and healthcare providers can help reduce c-sections in low-risk women. Evidence shows that doula support improves birth outcomes, including a vaginal delivery with lowered risk of episiotomy and other interventions. Benefits described in randomized trials include shortened labor, decreased need for analgesia, fewer operative deliveries, and increased satisfaction with the experience of labor. Read ACOG’s approach to preventing the primary c-section here.

According to the Healthy People 2030 initiative by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and Leapfrog Group’s Maternity Care Expert Panel, a hospital’s rate of first-time pregnancy (nulliparous/NTSV) c- c-section delivery should be measured against a national target of 23.6%. The World Health Organization states the international healthcare community has considered the ideal rate for c-sections to be between 10-15%.

Experts agree that episiotomies - an incision made in the perineum during childbirth - should not be done routinely and can result in worse perineal tears, loss of bladder or bowel control, and pelvic floor defects. According to Leapfrog Group, the national episiotomy rate should be 1% for all hospitals. Hospitals report on their episiotomy rate in vaginal deliveries.

To decrease perineal trauma during the second stage of labor, studies show it may be beneficial for nulliparous people to perform perineal massage in the weeks before labor begins; however, evidence is limited on the benefits and there’s no consensus on frequency or duration. Some studies showed that more frequent massage had less benefit than less frequent massage. As an alternative, there may be a benefit to applying warm compresses to the perineum during the crowning phase. More on that here.

For Leapfrog Group’s Hospital Survey, hospitals report on their rate of c-sections for first-time mothers giving birth to a single baby, at full-term, in the head-down position as well as their overall rate of episiotomy.

Reporting Period: Summer 2023

The following hospitals in metro Atlanta have reported their numbers to the Leapfrog Group. Northside Hospital in Atlanta DID NOT DISCLOSE their numbers.

• Emory Decatur averages 56 babies delivered per week, with an annual c-section rate of 31.5% and an episiotomy rate of 2.4%.

• Emory Midtown: annual 30.1% c-section, episiotomy 1.9%, averaged 106 weekly births

• Piedmont: annual 26.5% c-section, episiotomy 3.4%, averaged 56 weekly births

• North Fulton: 23.6% c-section, episiotomy 1.2%, averaged 25 weekly births

The following hospitals in St Pete / Tampa Bay region have reported their numbers to the Leapfrog Group. HCA Florida St. Petersburg Hospital has DECLINED TO RESPOND

• Bayfront Health “Baby Place” averages 63 live births per week, an annual 28.8% c-section rate, and an episiotomy rate of 1.7%.

• Morton Plant: annual 26.5% c-section, episiotomy 4.8%, averaged 45 weekly births.

• Tampa General Hospital: annual 26.6% c-section, episiotomy 1.5%, averaged 131 weekly births.

• Manatee Memorial Hospital: annual 36.7% c-section, episiotomy 4.5%, averaged 35 weekly births.

If your doctor or midwife can tell you their personal rates or the collective rate of their group, that’s great! It likely means they care about improving their patient outcomes by measuring their practice. Ask your provider.

Resources referenced:

*Text excerpts from Leap Frog Group: https://ratings.leapfroggroup.org/sites/default/files/inline-files/2021%20Maternity%20Care%20Fact%20Sheet_2.pdf

https://health.gov/healthypeople/objectives-and-data/browse-objectives/pregnancy-and-childbirth/reduce-cesarean-births-among-low-risk-women-no-prior-births-mich-06

https://www.who.int/reproductivehealth/publications/maternal_perinatal_health/cs-statement/en/

https://icea.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/ICEA-Position-Paper-Episiotomy-PP.pdf

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Nutrition Tips for Surviving and Thriving During Postpartum and Breastfeeding

by Jeni Standard, Certified Lactation Counselor, Doula and Childbirth Educator, Herbalist

Sleep deprivation and fluctuating hormone levels are real, and they are certainly enough to deal with on their own. Add in poor nutrition and you've got a fine recipe for postpartum depression, and low milk supply. Do yourself a favor, and take some time to plan for your postpartum period while you are still pregnant. Your wellness is worth it!
 

Here’s a simple recipe for a nutritious smoothie perfect for the postpartum time. It's packed with magnesium to alleviate muscle soreness, and potassium to help keep you hydrated and combat fatigue, and if you add a handful or two of raw or frozen spinach, it's packed with iron to rebuild blood stores.

For the postpartum time, new parents should concentrate on protein and collagen-rich foods to support the growth and repair of cells and to rebuild connective tissue. While delivery food services are quick and choices plentiful, limit refined, processed foods (sauces, drinks too!) and add anti-inflammatory foods to your meal plan in order to speed healing and sustain long-term diet success.

So fill your fridge, freezer, and pantry with ready-to-eat, delicious, nutrient-dense foods to help you optimize your post-natal time. Also, consider kitchen equipment that will make cooking easy and healthy. A high-powered blender like the Ninja is an affordable addition for quick smoothies and soups. A slow-cooker or all-in-one pressure cooker like the Insta-Pot (or Ninja) can cook frozen foods fast, make stews, roasts, yogurt, etc. Have fun and explore! Check out more ideas for healthy recipes and tips for simple meal prep here on our Pinterest board.

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7 Key Ingredients to a Good Night’s Sleep for Your Newborn

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, childbirth educator, and owner of The Happiest Doulas

Sleeping and getting your baby on a schedule are two of the most common subjects parents seem to have questions about. There are many scheduling options and philosophies on how to get your baby to sleep through the night. Read on to learn our tips.
 

I recommend you start your baby on a predictable routine between 6 and 8 weeks of age. Here are 7more tips for helping your baby get a good night's rest.

1. Create a daily routine. Be sure you are feeding your newborn every 2-3 hours during the day to ensure baby is getting enough calories during the day and not wanting those calories at night. Every 2-3 hours means from the start of one feeding to the start of the next. For example, if baby ate at 7am, he would need to start eating again between 9am and 10am.
   

2. Wake baby to feed during the day if it’s been longer than 3 hours since the start of the last feeding. This may be contrary to the advice you’ve heard of “never wake a sleeping baby”, but if you leave your baby to do a long stretch of sleep during the day, you will not get that long stretch to be at night.
   

3. Purchase a sound machine to keep on during naps and nighttime sleep. Conair Sound Therapy found on Amazon is an inexpensive, great sound machine that does the trick. Be sure to have it 2-3 feet from baby’s crib and turned up loud enough so you can close the nursery door and still hear it when you are standing on the outside of the door. Note: Be sure the timer button on the side is OFF.
   

4. Swaddle tightly with both arms down to baby’s sides. Swaddling turns off the “moro” (startle) reflex and flailing arms, creating a more calm and restful baby. Not sure how to swaddle? Check out our super easy swaddling technique below.
   

5. Choose a designated bedtime for baby between 7:00pm and 8:00pm. Putting baby in bed early will ensure he does not get overtired or overstimulated.
   

6. After putting your baby to bed at the designated time, treat all subsequent feedings through the night as nighttime feedings. This means the feedings should be done in as much darkness as possible with the least amount of stimulation possible. You want baby to realize nighttime is for sleeping and daytime is for interacting.
   

7. Once baby has reached its original birthweight and the doctor has said it is ok to no longer wake baby at nighttime for feedings, allow baby to wake on his own for the nighttime feedings. This will help baby establish his own body’s circadian rhythm and pattern instead of creating a habit of being woken every 3 hours throughout the night.

Bookmark this article for future reference and if you've found these tips useful, please share this post with other new parents. I hope this helps you jumpstart your way to having the happiest baby on the block and a restful night's sleep. 

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5 Reasons to Hire a Birth Doula

by Megan Ciampa, Birth Boot Camp Childbirth Instructor
 

It may be your first or your fourth, but when you’re pregnant and considering your baby’s birth and delivery, having the proper support team is critical in ensuring you and your baby get off to the right start. Did you know a birth doula can help with that?
 

When I was pregnant with my first child in 2009, I heard this new-to-me term thrown around, “doula.” I learned it was Greek for “mothering the mother” and it’s a professional birth worker trained in childbirth and labor who provides emotional, educational, and physical support to the pregnant woman before, during, and after labor. Generally that means she is not one of your friends or family members, or a part of the medical staff. While I thought that sounded nice, I couldn’t imagine anyone else in my birth environment other than my husband and our midwife/medical team. However, I was then exposed to the statistics of labor and birth for when a laboring mom has a doula present, and I was shocked. Doula? Hired.
 

Here’s why you want to hire a birth doula:

1. With birth doulas, the rate of cesarean section decreases 28%. I didn’t know much when I was pregnant with my first baby, but I knew that if I could avoid a c-section, that would be ideal! A labor doula’s continuous support throughout childbirth help a mom feel more at ease, reduce discomfort, and help her find different positions to move into to help baby down and out the birth canal. A c-section, while it can be a life-saving surgery, is major abdominal surgery and can put mom and baby at risk during and after birth. (Statistics from Cochrane Review)

2. With a labor doula, the use of Pitocin decreases 31%. Have you ever watched A Baby Story on TLC, or any other reality birth TV? If you have, then you may have seen what happens when a mom who is laboring naturally, on her own, is given Pitocin (which is a synthetic version of Oxytocin, a hormone our body naturally produces during labor, breastfeeding, and lovemaking, which assists in making the uterus contract). When a woman is given pitocin, the intensity and strength of her contractions increase significantly. And because it’s a synthetic hormone, the body cannot respond with its own stress release mechanisms the same way, and it’s extremely uncomfortable for the laboring mom. While labor can be done without an epidural, many a woman opts for an epidural after pitocin is administered to help cope with this incredible intensity. (Statistics from Cochrane Review)

3. With doulas, the likelihood of spontaneous vaginal birth increases 12%. Spontaneous vaginal birth is the simplest kind of delivery process. It just means vaginal delivery happens on its own, without doctors or midwives using any tools like forceps or a vacuum, to help pull the baby out. This is a good thing because while any of these tools may occasionally be used for emergency purposes, they also come at a risk to the mom and baby. Doulas can help the mom get into a better birthing position that applies the right amount of pressure to her cervix to allow baby to come out safely. (Statistics from Cochrane Review)

4. With doulas, the risk of being dissatisfied with the birth experience decreases 34%! With a labor doula present, you can know you have probably tried every option and resource possible to ensure you have as good a birth experience as possible. Because they have knowledge, tools and other resources available to them to assist you, it relieves pressure and anxiety on your partner or spouse, who may also be needing some emotional support during labor, and helps equip them to help you. All of this in turn? Drives higher satisfaction for you during your birth experience. (Statistics from Cochrane Review)

5. With birth doulas, the length of labor can decrease by 25%! I don’t know about you, but when I watched A Baby Story and saw the clock ticking and how long those moms were laboring to bring their babies to the world, my empathetic heart hurt for them. Those can be some long, hard hours. So, with a doula present, who helps you feel more safe, secure, and emotionally present, often labors are shorter. With my first birth, my highly experienced doula had me try several positions: squatting, walking, rocking, sitting on the toilet (it relaxes you in an unexpected way--trust me!) to help me get the baby further down the birth canal. I’m convinced that without her efforts, my approximately 12 hour labor, which is pretty great for a first-time mom, would’ve lasted hours longer! (Statistics from americanpregnancy.org)

Experts agree that Cesarean Sections or c-sections, particularly among low-risk, first-time mothers, may not be necessary and can be actually be risky for mother and baby. Various evidence-based strategies aimed at hospitals and health care providers can help reduce c-sections in low-risk women. Evidence shows that doula support improves birth outcomes, including a vaginal delivery with lowered risk of episiotomy and other interventions.

A doula is a pretty great person to have around when you’re pregnant and giving birth, as well as afterwards in the postpartum period. While doulas weren’t so common about 10 years ago, they are sought after more than ever. Won’t you hire a birth doula today?

References:

https://evidencebasedbirth.com/the-evidence-for-doulas/
http://americanpregnancy.org/labor-and-birth/having-a-doula/ 

Doula Support

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Related posts:
6 Points to Consider When Hiring a Labor Doula 
Avoid Routine Medical Interventions
When Your Water Breaks
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We're growing our family too!

Looking to join a doula team? Work with us in Tampa Bay or Atlanta.

Are you an aspiring birth doula unsure where to start? Cynthya, agency owner and doula became a certified labor doula via Childbirth International (CBI) well over a decade ago. She continues to recommend this organization for online, self-paced doula training which you can begin now. To help you identify your top choices, read CBI’s Guide To Becoming A Doula and then compare some popular options both online and in person.

Vice President Kendra Holmann, of the Tampa Bay Birth Network, talks about her search for a doula program that would fit her needs and values when looking for training organizations.

If you’re a seasoned labor doula (or a new one!) wanting to join an experienced team for secure backup and fabulous clients, we’d love to know all about you. If you’re looking to dive in and deepen your work as a birth pro, we want to meet you. Show us your moxie - send Cynthya hellos, requests, resumes, and videos for applications. Shoutouts @happiestdoula on Pinterest.

These 6 Tips Will Teach You How to Comfortably NOT Breastfeed

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, Childbirth Educator, and owner of The Happiest Doulas

There are many reasons people choose not to breastfeed or cannot physically breastfeed. If you are in the category of not breastfeeding, remember, that is okay! Do not allow others to put you on a guilt trip. It is your body and your baby, so choosing what works for you is your decision!
 

 

A bit about milk production:

About halfway through pregnancy, your body begins making colostrum. After delivery of the baby and placenta, your body will begin to make more mature milk that will start to “come in” after a few days. If the milk is not being used by feeding or pumping, milk production will gradually slow down and eventually stop. Around 7-10 days postpartum, hormones should return to the non-pregnant level. Here are some tips to help ease the discomfort or engorgement you may feel while your milk is drying up.
 

1. Protect and cover by wearing a supportive bra without underwire. Binding the breasts is not necessary and can lead to mastitis and plugged ducts.

2. Apply cool compresses or ice packs to the breasts. Some prefer frozen peas as they shape the breast nicely.

3. Take anti-inflammatory medicine like ibuprofen.

4. If the discomfort is unbearable, it is ok to express a small amount of milk; but only enough to ease the discomfort. Keep in mind, though, expression at regular intervals can signal the body to produce more milk and slow down the drying-up process.  

5. Shield when showering! Stand with your breasts away from the warm water flow, as the water can stimulate milk flow, and thus, milk production.

6. Soothe with raw cabbage leaves inside your bra around the breasts. You can refrigerate or freeze the leaves for a nice cool sensation. There has not been a lot of research done to support cabbage-reducing milk production, but it is a safe method, eases discomfort, and is worth a try.
    

If you notice signs of mastitis, such as painful redness in a pie slice shape on the breast, warmth to the touch, fever, or fatigue resembling flu symptoms, please contact your doctor immediately. You may need medication to treat the infection, and delaying treatment can worsen your condition.

Although many herbal supplements are suggested online, consult an herbalist and your doctor before trying any, as they can be toxic if misused, have unknown side effects, or might interact negatively with medications, including over-the-counter ones.

Ultimately, you know what's best for your situation. Whether you decide to pump or breastfeed, we support your choice and are here to help if needed.

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Postpartum Expectations and Must-have Items

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, childbirth educator, and owner of The Happiest Doulas

In addition to filling your freezer with nutritious meals, lining up pet sitters, and daily help from family and friends, you'll want to stock up on postpartum supplies to have on hand upon your discharge from your birthing facility. Below are a dozen comfort suggestions to help you prepare for an easier postpartum time and a speedy recovery for both surgical and vaginal deliveries.

 

This post does NOT include any affiliate links for the below suggested items used for an easy postpartum recovery. We are sharing these links to help you prepare for parenthood. Also, here is our recommended gift registry for infant and breastfeeding gear that you may copy on Babylist to prepare for your baby showers. Happy Shopping!

After care items for a vaginal birth:

1. Epifoam
   If you receive stitches on your perineum, you'll likely receive a numbing spray called Epifoam while in the hospital. If you need more after your return home, ask your doctor if Dermaplast (over the counter) is an acceptable alternative.
   

2. Sitz baths
   This plastic tub is placed directly on the toilet rim (seat up) and you sit on it as it circulates warm water on your bottom via a tube connected to a bag you fill from the sink. This helps clean your bottom, may encourage urination, and will help with healing. Many women find it very comforting. Follow this with an ice pack! (Insert sigh of relief!) Your hospital may offer you a sitz bath or you can find this at your local pharmacy.
   

3. Peri-bottle
   Following the birth of your baby, you will be given a small plastic bottle filled with warm water. Use it to squirt on your bottom as much as necessary to help encourage urination and dilute the sting caused from urine. Once your bladder is empty, squirt your bottom again gently with as much water as necessary to help clean your bottom. Then PAT your bottom dry with hospital wash cloths or toilet paper. Take your bottle home with you or buy a few to keep in each of your bathrooms.
   

For both type of deliveries:

1. Doughnut-shaped pillow or wedge (V-shaped) cushion
   Called coccydynia or coccygodynia, tailbone pain usually goes away on its own within a few weeks or months after childbirth. To lessen pain while sitting, use a doughnut-shaped pillow or wedge (V-shaped) cushion. Try a dollar store pool tube!
   

2. Witch hazel or Tuck's pads
   Found at your local pharmacy, witch hazel is an over the counter astringent, which can be used to help shrink hemorrhoids. Most commercial bottles of witch hazel contain alcohol so it may sting with direct application. TJ Dickinson's is a brand that sells pure witch hazel. It may take you some time to locate TJ's unless you shop at Whole Foods. (You may want to try the wipes, Tuck's pads, or Preparation H.) If using the liquid, you can make a “padcicle” by soaking a pad with witch hazel and placing it in a clean Ziploc bag then freezing it. Once frozen, remove it and wear it as normal. Many women find this very comforting for their swollen, sore bottoms – especially after a vaginal delivery.
   

3. Senokot
   A gentle vegetable-based laxative called Senokot may be offered to you at the hospital. You can also find it over the counter at your local pharmacy. It is generally well-tolerated (doesn’t cause intestinal cramping) and takes effect within about 12 hours, so it’s usually taken in the evening.
   

4. Colace
   To help with those first few postpartum bowel movements, you may want to try Colace, a stool softener, during the first several days. Once you are eating/drinking somewhat “normally” and soreness has subsided, you may wish to stop taking these medications. Both can be taken on an as-needed basis in the future.
   

5. Maxi Pads (overnight/heavy flow with wings)
   Bleeding for the first 6-8 weeks following delivery is normal. It is called Lochia (LOW-kee-uh). It will begin as very heavy, bright red bleeding that will gradually diminish to a dark red, brown and then to a more yellowish color. During this time period, nothing at all should be introduced to the vagina. Only wear pads, cloth/reusable or disposable, no douching, and no sexual intercourse until the lochia flow has stopped and you have been cleared by your provider.
   

6. "Granny" or Mesh Panties
   At the hospital, you will use mesh panties to hold your pad and ice pack. Bring the mesh underwear home with you or have a pair or two at home. If you've had a c-section, try the C-Panty. Here’s a listing of postpartum panties to find the right type for you.
   

7. Ibuprofen Pain Reliever (Motrin/Advil)
   6-800mg of ibuprofen will be brought to you every 6 hours in the hospital, along with some crackers. This medicine will help with cramping, and will also help with inflammation “down below.” Most women find the ibuprofen is enough to manage their pain, but if you are still experiencing a lot of pain, ask your nurse for something else (usually taken in conjunction with the ibuprofen). You will be sent home with a prescription for the 800mg tabs of ibuprofen.
   

8. Nursing Pads
   When you nurse your baby, you will experience what is called a “let down”, which is simply the release of milk from your breasts at the same time. When you hear your baby cry, you may also leak milk and appreciate wearing nursing pads. Both reusable/washable and disposable pads are available for purchase. If you don't plan to breastfeed, you'll still need pads for a bit of time as well as a head of cabbage kept in your fridge.

9. Nipple Cream
   In the first few weeks breastfeeding, your nipples may get a bit sore. Nipple cream by Earth Mama Angel Baby or Motherlove will help soothe and heal the affected areas. Alternatively, you could try organic coconut oil.

It Takes A Village

You will need to build your village of support people. It’s important for BOTH parents to seek out support from other parents – not just friends, but other people who have kids and “get it.” Both men and women experience postpartum depression. Read this to be able to recognize the signs of postpartum anxiety and depression. 

Find a support group NOW so you know who/where to turn to for help. You can always call your doula or care provider if you need suggestions. We're here for you.

Finally, you may wish to arrange a lesson with an infant care specialist for hands-on guidance on newborn care. Doing so will help ease your transition to parenthood. Best wishes!

 

Doula Support

Related Articles:
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Tips To Help Make Breastfeeding Easier
4 Things To Do Now For a Healthier Postpartum
Episiotomy, Tears, and Perineal Support

When Your Water Breaks: AROM Labor Management

“I think we should try breaking your water to help speed things up,” said the OB. This is a very common method of attempting to hasten a stalled or slow labor, or an induction of labor. It sounds promising, but does breaking the amniotic sac - a procedure known as “amniotomy” or AROM (artificial rupture of membranes) - always accomplish this? 

Are there any risks associated with this intervention? Because this procedure is quite commonplace in American hospitals, here’s the scoop on some of the science, benefits, and risks surrounding this procedure.
 

So what exactly is the “bag of water(s)” or the amniotic sac? 

It is a very thin, strong, membrane that contains fluid that surrounds your baby in the uterus. This creates a nice cushion for your baby to soften any jolts or impacts to the belly. It also helps maintain a constant temperature and allows for easier movement and growth of your baby.
 

Why break it? The belief behind amniotomy in early labor, to induce labor, or to kick-start stalled labor before 6cm, is that breaking the bag of water using a small amniohook removes the fluid cushion between the baby’s head and the cervix, allowing more pressure to be placed on the cervix, resulting in faster dilatation of cervix. Often - whether artificially or on its own - the water breaking will encourage a rise in your natural oxytocin level, thus bringing on more contractions. Sounds great, right? 

Maybe not. Opponents of AROM argue that the amniotic sac and fluid play an important role in protecting your baby against the stress of contractions. Imagine trying to squeeze/crack an egg inside a filled water balloon using pressure from your hands around the balloon. 

Every time you squeeze, the squeeze is translated to pressure across the surface of the egg and it can move down and around as needed. Same concept with baby and their umbilical cord. That fluid can also make it easier for your baby to maneuver, should any additional maneuvering be necessary. 

“Your intact amniotic sac can actually help with thinning and dilatation of the cervix.”

But what about the whole speeding up labor thing? 

Although amniotomy can help shorten labor by one hour according to the American Pregnancy Association if done at the appropriate time, your intact amniotic sac can actually help with thinning and dilatation of the cervix as well, thanks to the water in front of baby’s head creating even pressure across the cervix. So leaving everything alone and letting your body do it’s job can also shorten your labor versus starting interventions that may not necessarily be needed.
 

What’s this about risks? 

As with everything in life, there are also risks associated with artificially rupturing the membranes. These can include: 

• A prolapsed cord. This is when baby’s umbilical cord slips past the head into the vagina, cutting off circulation to baby significantly, resulting in an emergent c-section.

• Risk of infection is also a problem. For this reason, most providers won’t let you labor too far past 24 hours after your water breaks or is broken and will suggest a c-section if your water is broken and you are not ready to push the baby out.

• Another possible risk can be with the baby’s heart rate. Without the cushion of the fluid, it can be harder to un-squish an umbilical cord or placenta that is thought to be causing a drop in baby’s heart rate.

• Also worth noting; a common side-effect of AROM is a significant increase in the intensity of what you are feeling, and are more inclined to ask for pain management or epidural.

That last one is not a true “risk” factor (and I myself have been a fan of the epidural) but for those who wish to avoid medicinal pain management and intervention domino-effect, it can make sticking to that choice much more difficult.

So no AROM ever, right?? 

WRONG. There are exceptions to almost everything in labor, and this is no different. If your baby is showing signs of extended distress and the medical staff are unable to get an accurate reading on the external monitor, it may be necessary to apply an internal monitor to the baby’s head in order to monitor baby’s heart rate without signal loss to ensure the heart rate stays stable. This is a situation where modern medicine and interventions shine and truly help protect baby and mother.

“The evidence showed no shortening of the length of first stage of labor and a possible increase in caesarean section.”

For those who skip to the end of these long posts to get the short version...Providers often suggest AROM to “speed things up” or “bring on labor.” However, a recent Cochrane review of 15 studies involving 5583 women states that “the evidence showed no shortening of the length of first stage of labor and a possible increase in caesarean section. Routine amniotomy is not recommended for normally progressing labors or in labors which have become prolonged.” The World Health Organization also reviewed the findings and supports that recommendation. 

This is not to say it doesn’t ever help. It is simply best to understand your options, and always weigh risk versus benefit. No matter whether you choose to have your water broken or wish to avoid having it done, be sure you are making your choices because you understand and are comfortable with the decision at hand.
 

Related posts:   How To Avoid Routine Medical Interventions  5 Reasons to Hire a Birth Doula  5 Labor Tools for Partners

Skin Elasticity During Pregnancy and Beyond

by Jeni Standard, Certified Lactation Counselor, Doula and Childbirth Educator, Herbalist

While stretch marks are our tiger stripes, who needs loads of them to remember what fierce creatures we become to bring our babies into the world? Genetics does seem to stack the odds against us, but how we feed our bodies may help turn those odds in our favor.

7 Important Nutritional Components For Your Health
 

1. Omega-3 Fatty Acids help produce the necessary oils that keep skin soft

These are polyunsaturated fats found in a variety of foods, but are most concentrated in fatty, cold-water fish. To consume Omega-3 fats through food, you will need to take different dietary approaches depending on your food lifestyle. For instance, if you are vegan, you may consider supplementing.

Whole Food Sources~ trout, salmon, sardines, flax, avocado, sea vegetables, coconut oil (also great to slather all over your beautiful pregnant self), walnuts, dark green leafy vegetables, pastured meats, and pastured dairy products.
 

2. Antioxidant Vitamins like A, C, and E help to fight lines and wrinkles

The Free Radical Fighters! These antioxidants help reduce the amount of free radicals running loose in your body, and help to protect your skin from harmful UV rays while you are soaking up some vitamin D. Moms are always multitasking!  

Whole Food Sources~ sweet potatoes, spinach, kale, Brussels sprouts, carrots, cooked tomatoes, broccoli, red and yellow bell peppers, oranges, mangoes, beets, berries, prunes, and raw seeds.
 

3. Vitamin D boosts elasticity and stimulates collagen production

This amazing body that we live in can synthesize vitamin D from bare skin exposure to sunlight. We can only have so much time in the sun these days, though. Fortunately, some go-to foods can help us with the balance.

Whole Food Sources~ fatty fish like salmon and trout, portobello mushrooms, whole grain cereals, pastured dairy products, and tofu.
 

4. Collagen provides the skin with strength, waterproofing, and elasticity

Collagen is a protein produced by the body and found in our connective tissue. Most relevant to this topic, it helps to make up the second layer of skin (dermis). You can help to increase the collagen in your skin by eating loads of collagen-boosting foods.

Whole Food Sources~ bone broth, beans, avocados, and other foods rich in Omega-3s and antioxidants.
 

5. Zinc is a trace mineral that helps to repair damaged tissue and heal wounds

Not only is it one of the more abundant trace minerals in the body, zinc is also easily found in an abundance of foods.

Whole Food Sources~ green veggies, nuts, seeds, whole grains, beans, mushrooms, pastured beef, chicken, and most other animal proteins.
 

6. Silica is a trace mineral that helps to maintain elasticity and that healthy glow

Silica is the largest component in collagen, and after oxygen, the most abundant element on Earth. When we are children, we have loads of silica, because it's also necessary for bone growth. As we age, we lose our stores of silica, and thus its benefits to our skin. You can replenish silica regularly through food however, it can be challenging to maintain high levels without supplementation.

Whole Food Sources~ apples, cherries, almonds, oranges, oats, seeds, and pastured animal proteins.
 

7. Hydration - you know the drill mamas! 

The average adult is made up of 60% water. Currently, you are not an average adult; you are a clever, magnificent woman growing another life. Which means increased blood volume, and there is the small matter of that sac of water around your baby to maintain. Needless to say, you need plenty of water now more than ever. Plus, properly hydrated skin equals stretchy skin. It's recommended that you consume 8-12 8oz glasses, but listen to your body for signs of dehydration.

 

As Soft As Baby's Skin: Protect Your Largest Organ

You won't always be pregnant, but you will always be in your skin. You may as well set it up for a sassy rebound. For delicious recipes to try, we recommend you use Beautiful Babies: Nutrition for Fertility, Pregnancy, Breastfeeding, and Baby's First Foods.

The postpartum family transitions from pregnancy to birth, leaving the hospital with a newborn to care for. Although expected and obvious, this "fourth trimester" can shock the system with sleep deprivation, limited time to take care of everyday needs, causing new parents to often rely on takeout and pizza delivery. Stock the freezer now with nutritious meals designed for post-natal and nursing parents.

Related articles:
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Tips To Help Make Breastfeeding Easier
Easy Ways to Support Your Postnatal Nutrition

4 Tips For Designing a Practical Nursery

Has your pregnancy raced by and now you’re gearing up to welcome your little darling? Childbirth class {check}, baby shower {check}, doula, {wink-wink, check} and NOW it’s time to plan the nursery décor. We’ve broken it down into an easy, fun, and money-saving task that we hope you’ll find useful.
 

FUNCTION

How do you imagine yourself in the space? Will your baby only be sleeping in the room? Will it double as a guest room or playroom? All of the functions of the room matter when choosing suitable furniture. Transitional cribs that convert from a baby crib to a toddler bed are GENIUS! They usually cost a bit more but are less hassle than using a crib for 18 months and then having to re-buy furniture. Buy once and use it all for the years to come instead of just for the first.

If family members or friends plans to visit frequently, why not put a day bed in the room? It's small enough, yet useful for nights when the baby just won't sleep or a guest is in town and baby bunks with you. The nursery doesn't have to be all lambs and lavender.

BEDDING

Usually, the first choice most expectant parents make is which crib and bedding to buy. Sweet white linen bed sets are truly darling but they are NOT practical. Ever cleaned baby poo on something white? Think durability, clean-ability, and longevity. That pink raw silk crib bumper pad may look gorgeous on the fabulous baby bed in the pricey boutique, but imagine its first encounter with a diaper blowout or spit up.

LIGHTING

Lamps will enhance the way you feel in your home. They can be arranged in certain areas around the nursery creating cozy nooks for feeding, reading, or simply lighting art on your walls or shelves. Cabinets that have lighting inside of them work wonders too. 

Create the mood for your baby's room just as you would your own bedroom. Harsh overhead lighting isn't the most soothing when you are awake for a 2:00 am feeding. Try ambient lighting.
 

COLOR

Have you thought about what colors make you happy? Imagine yourself in the space and how you would like both you and your baby to FEEL while spending time within the room. 

Did you know there is a psychology to color choice? It's true. Marketing firms use colors such as red, orange, and yellow in fast food advertising to stimulate hunger and cause visual attraction. Maybe you adore daffodil yellow, however yellow can cause anxiety. Perhaps using yellow as a hint of trim or as an accent color would be better than 150 square feet of yellow walls.

Blues and greens are the colors of the sky, sea, and vegetation and all are triggers for emotional rest and calm. Soft neutrals, light blues, and greens can create a more tranquil feel such as you would experience in a spa atmosphere. Think about which color makes you feel the most peaceful and save the bright colors for the future playroom.

3 Things to Keep in Mind

1. A quick and easy cleanup is a must for the busy family! Famous architect, Louis Sullivan, said: “Form follows function.” Practical doesn’t necessarily equal plain. Consider materials that are easily cleaned so you don't cringe with every mess.

2. Design a nursery that is practical for both parents. Think of how you will be functioning in the space since you will be spending a lot of time there! Grandma’s heirloom cherry wood rocker may be gorgeous, but may not be the most comfortable. Test gliders or rockers and ottomans ahead of time. Sit down and get comfy, prop up your feet! Find the chair in which you can feed a baby AND take a nap for yourself.

3. Consider how you want the nursery to look. Do you want to create an environment that will grow with the baby into their childhood or be passed on to the next sibling? Choosing a long-term look can be cost-effective and a wise investment in quality home décor.

If swollen feet (or the pandemic) are keeping you from hitting the stores, shop online. Often with free shipping, it’s a win-win for the efficient and busy expectant parent. Check out Wayfair for their offerings of everything from nurseries to playrooms and bedding to lighting. Save your back and have your room renovation delivered right to your front door.

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Related articles:
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6 Ways to Survive a Colicky Baby
Nursery Product Safety Standards and SIDS Prevention

Tips To Help Make Breastfeeding Easier When Going Back To Work

Being a parent is a full time job and trying to breastfeed is a full time job. Now add going back to your “real” full time job while trying to balance being a mom/wife and trying to keep up with breastfeeding is one word: STRESSFULL!!

Breastfeeding is not the norm for much of the USA and it’s hard to get people to understand the amount of work it takes to be successful at it. To promote breastfeeding success while you are still pregnant keep these helpful tips handy.

• Register for an extra slow flow nipple like a preemie nipple for the bottles you choose. No need to size up unless they are sucking so hard they are collapsing the nipple. Our breasts rate of flow don’t change as babies grow, so the flow from the bottle doesn’t need to either.
  

• Don’t open/wash all the bottles you get. Most stores will let you exchange the bottles if they don’t agree with your baby.
  

• Get free bottles of various brands whenever you can. This way you will have lots to test out if they don’t like the one you registered for when it comes time to introduce a bottle to your baby. Once you find one that works for you and your baby, pay it forward and give the bottles to another pregnant person you may know.
  

• Buy a good hands-free pumping bra. I really liked the Simple Wishes Hands-Free Breastpump Bra. I have a large cup size and it held everything in place well.
  

• If you can afford it, have two pumps. One for work and one for home to reduce the amount of stuff you have to haul back and forth. Consignment sales are a great place to buy a closed system pumps (like the Spectra) that are safe to reuse from person to person.
  

• Order a pump through your insurance. A lot of the time they are free. You may need a prescription from your OB/Midwife for a pump before ordering one. I personally loved my Spectra S2.
  

• For more info on how to best prepare to breastfeed, see if this affiliate online course and other resources (some are free!) by Lactation Link are right for you.

“Your success of being a working, breastfeeding person is not measured in ounces in your freezer. It’s measured in the happiness of you and your baby.”

Before your return to work, follow these tips to promote healthy breastfeeding:

• Don’t worry about pumping for the first 4-6 weeks of baby’s life unless you have to return to work before 6 weeks. Just enjoy your baby and let your body regulate its milk supply before you start making it oversupply. That can cause a lot of other issues for you later on. If you do have to return earlier, start pumping two weeks before going back.
  

• You only need enough milk to fill the bottles the first day (1-1.5 oz. per hour when away from baby). You will replace those when you pump. Having a huge milk stash is not needed and it takes up so much space in your freezer. Your success of being a working, breastfeeding person is not measured in ounces in your freezer. It’s measured in the happiness of you and your baby.
  

• Introduce a bottle 1-2 times a week starting around 3-4 weeks old. At this time baby should have figured out latching pretty well, so there is no need to worry about nipple confusion. Have someone else feed the bottle as some babies don’t take a bottle well when the breast is nearby. You can also introduce a pacifier at this point as well.
  

• It doesn’t have to be a full feeding. It can just be a snack.
  

• Watch videos on pumping to see how to get the most milk out.
  

• Make sure you have the right size flanges. Nipples should not rub the sides and shouldn’t be sliding all the way down the flange.
  

Next up: Pumping and Breastfeeding Tips For Going Back To Work.

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Pumping and Breastfeeding Tips For Going Back To Work

Caring For Aging Parents and Young Children at the Same Time

In 2018, nearly 10 million millennials acted as unpaid caregivers to adults over the age of 65, as reported by the AARP. These millennials usually fall in the age range of early 20s to mid-30s, which is also a common age for many adults to start having children. People in this unique situation are often referred to as the “sandwich generation,” as they are sandwiched between taking care of their aging parents and their growing children.

Since adults of the sandwich generation are spread between their responsibilities toward their children, parents, and careers, they are often susceptible to both mental and financial stress. It is therefore important for them to seek resources that can help them manage their situation. Below, we’ve provided a few tips if you are an adult of the sandwich generation to help you balance your multiple caregiving responsibilities.

Have a Financial Plan

If both your children and your parents are relying on you financially, you may end up running higher living costs on a month-to-month basis. Thus, you need to look for strategies that can help keep you at a decent level of financial health. Start by creating a family budget. Determine how much you need to spend on your children, your parents, and your own necessities, then cut down any unnecessary spending to increase your funds for emergencies.

You may also need to seek good insurance programs to account for any unexpected costs. Fortunately, older adults have many affordable insurance options, particularly in healthcare, which means you have many ways to cut down on your parents’ expenses. For example, you can enroll your parents under Medicare to cut down on healthcare costs. Kelsey Care Advantage outlines how Medicare Advantage plans can cover supplementary benefits for seniors, such as vision coverage, dental coverage, and prescription drugs. As the parents get older the chances of them needing medical care increases, which is why it is wise to have a financial safety net ready. It’s also best to select a plan that provides additional coverage on top of medical expenses to really maximize your savings.

Connect your children and parents

Both your children and your parents have social needs, and should be around other people to boost their mental wellbeing. You can help them achieve this by signing them up for groups in order to meet new people and make friends. If that isn’t possible due to age or an underlying condition, you can also frequently bring your parents and children together. This will solidify their familial bond and provide both with a positive social interaction.

Verywell Family notes that physical proximity and frequent contact are major predictors of a close relationship between grandparents and grandchildren. If you don’t live together, you can always bring your kids with you while visiting your parents. This way, you can provide care in one place, while also giving them the space to get to know one another.

Ask for help

Of course, you don’t have to do everything on your own. You can always hire professional help for assistance with caregiving tasks, or even housekeeping chores. Cleaners, cooks, and babysitters can all help take some of the load off your plate. New parents can also seek support for their pregnancies, such as the doula services provided here at Happiest Doulas.

You can also seek help from healthcare professionals, who can use their knowledge of medical procedures to administer care for aging adults. In today’s highly digitized world, you might not even need the professional with you physically. Healthcare professionals can use telehealth to monitor their patients and administer care remotely.

Research family benefits at your workplace

You may be able to take advantage of employee benefits that will help you manage your situation. Check if your workplace offers job-protected leave for family concerns, as this is something that you may be entitled to. The Family and Medical Leave Act allows employees to take 12 weeks off for certain situations, such as childbirth, and caring for family members with serious medical conditions. When you take these kinds of leaves, your employer is required to maintain any provided group health benefits.

Being part of the sandwich generation can be difficult. Fortunately, there are many resources available that can help caregivers manage their numerous responsibilities.

Related posts:
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Life with a Newborn
Maternity Care in America

Prenatal Exercises and Birthing Positions for Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, owner of The Happiest Doulas

A condition called Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction (SPD) occurs when the ligaments that keep your pelvis aligned during pregnancy become too relaxed (due to the hormone relaxin) and causes excessive movement of the pubis symphysis. This can make walking or sitting difficult, and sometimes extremely painful, affecting approximately 1 of 4 pregnant women.

It is recommended that women with Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction give birth in an upright position with knees slightly apart. Another option is the all-fours position, keeping the knees close together. A waterbirth may be preferable as water allows buoyancy that can support the joints. And soaking in a warm tub is divine during labor!

Pelvic Floor Squeezes, Stability Exercises, Inner Thigh Stretches, Pelvic Tilts, Back and Side Stretches

Symphysis Pubis Disorder is not harmful, but it is painful. There are exercises to relieve SPD. If any exercise seems to cause you more pain, stop immediately. If your pain lasts or seems to get worse, talk to your obstetrician. For info about rehabilitation, prevention, and reoccurrence management of SPD in subsequent pregnancies, read this article which includes stability exercises.

Watch the below video for how to give birth more comfortably with SPD. Additionally, strengthening the pelvic floor muscles will help to stabilize the spine, support the pelvic organs, and prevent incontinence.

Related articles:
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What Every Female Runner Should Know Postpartum
How To Avoid Routine Medical Interventions

FAQS

Virtual Doula Support

Sleep More with The Cuddle Cure: 5 Easy Steps to Stop Your Baby's Crying and Lengthen Sleep Time

by Cynthya Dzialo, certified Hypnobabies hypno-doula and CBI birth doula, childbirth educator, and owner of The Happiest Doulas

Picture this. It's 2am and you've just finished feeding your baby. You've burped him, changed his diaper, and as you are dressing him, he begins to cry. You sing a little tune and pick him up but on he cries, now even louder. You rock him, turn off the lights, and shush him for a few minutes until he settles and you put him back into his crib. He needs to sleep. (So do you.) But he begins to cry again and you can't soothe him with your song. You pick him up, rock and shush some more, but to no avail. The wailing continues for over an hour! By the end of it, when he has finally fallen back to sleep, you're scared to place him back into his crib so you stay awake, holding him until the next feeding.

New parents are told to "sleep when the baby sleeps." HA! If only.

Babies are born with many reflexes; crying, sneezing, coughing, etc. Dr. Harvey Karp, a pediatrician from California, discovered all babies are also born with a "calming reflex" too. By recreating sensations experienced in the womb, you can send your baby into dreamland with the following 5 simple steps: 
 

1. Swaddle tightly
   Don't be alarmed if you notice your baby seems to fuss and struggle when you start to swaddle. Swaddling is not meant to calm the baby down, but to turn off his startle (Moro) reflex and help him pay attention to the following 4 steps. Use SwaddleMe velcro blankets found at Target along with receiving blankets cut in half to make a triangle shape. Read our sleep tips and watch a video how to swaddle.
   

2. Side-lying position
   Hold your baby in the "football hold" in a side-lying position. This imitates the position he had inside the womb and turns off the startle reflex. This position is for soothing only, not for sleeping. Back is best for sleeping.
   

3. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
   Making a loud, continuous "shhhhh" sound 2-4 inches from baby's ear will calm him almost instantly! Shhhhh as loudly as your baby cries so he can hear you. The sound inside the womb it at a level of 80-90 decibels - 2 times louder than a vacuum and the quiet outside often makes them cry. During times of sleep, use a loud white noise machine with the volume on the highest setting.
   

4. Swinging or jiggly motion
   Bouncing back and forth as you pat baby between the shoulder blades turns on motion sensors in the brain that imitate what baby felt like in the womb bouncing around in the amniotic fluid. You can rock, sway, or bounce - try using your "birth ball."
   

5. Sucking
   Use a pacifier, breast, or a clean finger to soothe baby into sleep mode. This alone is a strong reflex so use it to your advantage.
   

More tips for dealing with gas and fussiness:

• Utilize your chiropractor. Birth can be a traumatic body experience for babies and if any part of their spine is out of line, it can cause gas and fussiness and even problems with sucking and swallowing. Think about how your neck hurts after sleeping "funny" and how much an adjustment can quickly alleviate discomfort.

• Colic Calm is a homeopathic remedy found at most pharmacies that helps with gas, hiccups, and upset tummies.

• Bicycling baby's legs after feedings can help release gas bubbles.

• After feedings, burp baby well and hold him upright for 15 minutes to help digestion before placing him down to sleep.
   

Related articles:
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Your First Few Weeks with Baby

6 Tips to Getting Your Baby on Track: Sleep Scheduling and Controlled Crying

Sleep, oh the beloved word of parents in wishing they simply had more of it. Nothing prepares you for the sleep deprivation you will somehow survive through when you become a parent! Don’t co-sleep….Co-sleeping was the best thing we ever did….Don’t let your baby cry it out, it might ruin him….Crying it out was what worked for us…..the list of dos and don’ts in regards to the best sleeping method goes on and on. So what in the world should parents really do?  

There is no “one method fits all” for babies. We encourage all new parents to read and research as much as they can and choose a method or variety of methods that they feel comfortable with. Whatever method you choose, consistency is crucial and giving the method a good 3-5 nights before giving up on it and trying something else is key. 

According to Moms on Call 6-15 Months Book, “Let the baby cry on and off, even if the crying lasts an hour or two. They will fall asleep. Give it three to five nights. Parents are always so afraid the child will feel abandoned. So we have to ask: Are they abandoned? No, they are not abandoned. Then we parent out of truth. They are not abandoned and you will show up every morning at that predictable time and they will be ready for your warm embrace.”

Controlled Crying

If you feel uncomfortable with leaving your baby to cry alone, another method is “controlled crying” - the Ferber Method. Ferber designed a method of anytime your baby cries when he’s supposed to be sleeping, you can do check-ins at certain time intervals to pat and comfort your baby for about 30 seconds, without picking him up and then leave the room again when he’s still awake. Over the period of several nights, you gradually increase the time between check-ins, allowing your baby more time to learn to self soothe.  

Some other tips to try if you are in the midst of trying to sleep train or transition your baby from your bed to his own or from your room to his own:

1) Implement using a white noise machine throughout the duration of sleep time. Conair Sound Therapy on Amazon is the perfect, inexpensive machine that does a great job. Be sure it’s on the loudest volume setting so you can hear it on the other side of the closed door when you leave the room. Place it about 2 feet from the head of the crib at the same height level as the crib mattress. White noise promotes longer stretches of the deep REM sleep.

2) Utilize a bedtime routine. Having a warm bath, dimming the lights, reading/singing softly while cuddling is a great time for bonding and a great way to end baby’s day peacefully.

3) Once baby is in his designated sleeping room, do not take him out of that room for the remainder of the night. Taking baby out into the light in the middle of the night only causes him to be more alert and harder to put back to sleep.

4) Keep the sleeping area as dark as possible. Babies are not scared of the dark, so night lights are not needed and complete darkness promotes melatonin production for more restful sleep. 

5) Be sure baby is in his bed for the night between 7pm and 8pm. A late bedtime actually counteracts restful sleep and you will just end up with an overtired baby who doesn’t want to go to sleep and when he does, has a hard time staying asleep soundly.

6) Be sure the crib is free of distraction and entertainment. Mobiles and toys are cute, but you want baby to realize his crib is for sleeping, not playing.

Babies are creatures of habit and once a certain habit gets engrained in their routine, it takes time to break them of it. For example, if your baby has been used to nursing completely to sleep before being put into bed at night for 5 months, of course, the first night you lay him down without nursing, he is likely going to “sound an alarm” like a fire truck! But have no fear, it will get better, we promise!

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Epidural, Please!

by Christina Thomson, Certified Birth Doula and Lamaze Childbirth Educator

An epidural can be an amazing thing! There's a reason why 60% of women who give birth in the U.S. choose to get one during labor. Many women feel like their birth experience is more positive after receiving an epidural, and I have seen laboring women that I'm working with become so much more relaxed, focused, and finally able to catch their breath and rest after opting for one. For many women, just knowing that an epidural is part of the plan, when labor becomes too painful and intense, relieves some of the anxiety associated with the unknowns of being in labor and having a baby.
 

I've had several women tell me, “Oh, I don't need a doula. I'm planning to get an epidural.” Or they think that a doula will only support women who want a natural birth. Before I became a doula and when I first started my training, I thought the same thing! I now know that having a doula is a great resource, no matter what kind of birth you are planning to have. 

Your doula sees the bigger picture, and is there for you and your partner before, during, and after labor. As a continuous and trusted presence, your doula is there to help you understand the labor process, what your labor will look like and how it will change when you get an epidural. Your doula wants you to be informed and in control of your birth and can provide information and suggest questions you can ask your health care provider. 

“Having a doula is a great resource, no matter what kind of birth you are planning to have.”

Even if you are planning to get an epidural, a doula can support you while you labor at home and when you first arrive to the hospital. The transition from laboring at home to getting set up in the hospital and receiving an epidural will take some time. Knowing different methods to cope with the labor pain and any anxiety you feel will help make the transition easier. An epidural is just one form of pain management. A doula will help with other relaxation techniques before you get the epidural and can show you epidural friendly positions as you labor. You won't be able to move around as freely, but you can still change positions while in the bed, which will help you as you labor.
 

Your doula has a peanut ball and knows how to use it!

The peanut ball is most commonly used when a laboring mother needs to stay in bed. Studies show that epidurals lengthen the amount of time women spend in labor. Lengthy labors and ineffective pushing increase your chances of needing a c-section. Your doula will help you use a peanut ball to promote dilation and descent, change positions while you're in bed, and stay relaxed, which can help shorten your labor and make it less likely that you will need a c-section! Getting an epidural won't necessarily take away your anxiety about giving birth. Having someone with you, however, who is familiar with the labor process and can be reassuring and help you feel more confident and relaxed. 

Your doula will also be a great resource to your birth partner! Sometimes our birth partners are so focused on their loved one, they forget to take care of themselves! A doula is there to provide an extra pair of hands and remind both of you to rest and stay nourished. As Cynthya describes in one of her posts about the role of a doula, 

"A doula can preserve the intimacy of the birthing room and be a consistent care provider for you and your partner. Doulas maintain the ambiance of a labor room, keep good energy flowing, and help limit distractions, which allows the couple to relax and know they are cared for. Your doula wants to make sure that you both enjoy the birth of your child and has only your interest in mind. After all, birth is her passion and you've hired her for this special event - use her to your full advantage."
 

Your doula is on your team and trusts that you are a strong and capable woman who can listen to your body and decide what kind of birth you want to have and wants to help you embrace whatever forms of pain management you decide to use. She will be there supporting you along the way.

Review your options for building your support team by reading the profiles of our team.

Doula Support

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